Whoever started the whole thing should be awarded a medal or have a building named after them or something.It's such a simple concept and, sometimes, it makes describing sex easier for some people. It's become universal—when you tell someone you hit a home run last night, they'll probably catch your drift. The terms make it easy, not awkward, and completely conversational to talk about even the most outrageous sexual happenings.Remember back in middle school when baseball terms were used to describe how far you had gotten with a boy or girl that tickled your fancy? You would have had sex, but someone forgot the protection. Like when your woman brings in a relief pitcher—oh yes, she brought in the vibrator.
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But now, since the adolescent years have passed a lot more factors have been introduced into the sexual arena. Back when the whole thing started, the basic terms were vague because there were only four choices. Now, go get your own perfect game—just hope there isn't a rain delay.
First base just meant kissing, not necessarily tongue kissing, either.
When you made it to second base there was tongue kissing and above the belt fondling. When you rounded third it usually meant that there was some below the belt exploring.
As you were at second base, you realized you had a shot at an inside the park homerun.
You were in a rush to cross home plate because you weren't sure if you were dealing with a rookie or a switch-hitter.
But before you could get to the seventh inning stretch, you were stopped by a rain delay.
When it was all said and done you wound up getting a relief pitcher and bunting. Translation: You were tongue kissing when you realized you had a shot at getting oral.
You were in a rush to cross home plate because you weren't sure if you were dealing with a virgin or a bisexual.
But before you could get into some unusual positions, your parents came home.